The Son of the last of a long line of thinkers. (delascabezas) wrote in frankandeddie,
The Son of the last of a long line of thinkers.
delascabezas
frankandeddie

On The Art of Ruining Lunch

"Eddie, you think this is deep enough?"

"Mhm."

"O.K. Can you help me roll the body in. Oh, O.K. You are busy. I'll just..."

"Don't strain yourself Frank."

"Excuse me Mr. Brains! Hey, Why the fuck are you reading the paper anyway?"

"Frank, don't you know it is rude to interrupt people when they are reading?"

"Eddie, it scares me when you read. What the fuck are you doing? You should be helping me bury this guy."

"Looking for a new computer."

"Oh. Hey, too bad you can't look online, huh? Hand me the honey."

"Shutup dumbfuck."

"Wow, why are you such a sourpuss? Thanks."

"Look, I got kicked out of my guild because I can't get online."

"Oh, right, that morgue game thing. You think three bears is enough?"

"Don't belittle my pasttimes just because you don't understand them Frank. I made friends through that game. I connected with people. Three bears should be plenty. The ants should clean it all up in a couple days."

"Eddie, what did you do in that game?"

"Huh?"

"I mean, what did you spend your time doing? Dammit, I got some honey on my pantsleg. Gimme the Raid!"

"No! No Raid! Just brush them off. Raid, heh, that's funny. I spent most of my time killing stuff."

"Right. O.K. Why did you kill stuff?"

"To get money."

"I wish I had a tape recorcer. Fuck, these things are all over the place. Lets get outta here. Hand me the shovel."

"Here. Wait, why do you want a tape recorder?"

"Because you are telling me you made meaningful connections through an online game as a virtual hit man. I want to record this moment in stupidity for all posterity."

"Well, no. I mean.... Everyone... You... You don't understand."

"Nah, I think I do. C'mon, lets get some burgers."

"Ooh. Burgers sound good. Can we swing by Circut City on the way back?"

"Sure man, if it makes you feel better. I don't think this guy is going anywhere anytime soon."

"Those ants are gonna eat well this week. Hey, speaking of, I had this crazy dream last night..."

"No. No dreams. Your dreams are not acceptable pre-meal conversations."

"Seriously Frank. Just one?"

"Fine. Just move it huh, I want to get the burgers before all the kids get out of school."

"Do you think if you made a brains and Guiness float that the brains would float or sink?"

"Eddie, what the fuck is wrong with you?"

"What?"

"Who would possibly want a brains and Guiness float?"

"Oh. A zombie I guess. They were on the menu in this dream I was having. I remember asking the waiter about it, but I woke up before I got an answer. "

"That is so fucking..."

"I think they would float because Guiness is so heavy. You could order it 'a pint with a head and brains'."

"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I hate you. Lets go to Circut City."

"I thought we were getting burgers."

"Yeah, so did I before I agreed to listen to your stupid dreams."

"Oh."

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